Broken Ankle (Not a rant...an amazing story)

Thunder roared..and lightning flashed.

Rain pelted the assphault with a fury that no man has known til this day.
Through the darkness two faces can be seen in the instant that lightning strikes a nearby tree.

Standing six foot eight, weighing in at a massive 246 pounds, Martin Vikse, the overlord of a local viking millitia, slowly watches as his menacing opponent enters the basketball court.

Weighing in at 193 pounds and only standing five foot eight, One Big Farv appears to stand no chance against this modern day goliath.

The two opponents eye eachother up, Martin baring his teeth and growling..The crowd roars. It is going to be the match of a century. The stands are packed, as the crowd is filled with fans of both sides.

One big farv shoots for the possession, and sinks his beautiful foul shot..nothing but net. The crowd goes wild with an intense bloodlust. The ref checks the ball to him the ball and the game is on.

Farv goes up for the layup, but is stuffed by the beast that is Martin Vikse. Upon returning to the three point line Martin goes up and drains the fadeaway.

"This ain't bitch-ball," Martin says as he takes the ball. One big farv seems to look nervous as Martin dribbles the ball around the key. Farv stays low and plays tight defence and steals the ball from Vikse while he tries to show off to his fans. Farv takes the ball and dribbles past the three point line and drives in. Martin is too big though.. .. ..As Farv goes up with the ball so does Martin, but whats this? Farv tricks Martin with the pump fake and scores. ICE MAN!

All of a sudden Farv heres a tiny noise nearby "Meow"

Whats this. A kitten in a tree? OH NOES. Farv rushes as fast as he can, however lightning strikes the tree. Its on fire!

"Ill save you kitty!" Screams One Big Farv.

"Meow"

As farv rushes to the tree he steps on a twig. And broke his ankle. The end..or is it?









WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? LIKE ALL GOOD THINGS IN LIFE SOMEHOW IT GOT RUINED!!>!!111one. If there is one thing in life, I hate it when people lure me into something that seems good and then it turns out like shit. Like what you ask? Like the Pirates of the Carribean trilogy. I saw the first one when I was in grade 7 or grade 8 or whatever. I was entertained. Then I saw the second one in theaters, and it wasn't that good, however the ending left you hanging. Recently I saw the last one and I was like WTFYSOEZBBQ!!>!>!>!?!?!? and it was just terrible. Ive never slept through something as shitty as this. I mean come on, Davy jones could not be under the command of the brittish empire. Its just not logical. Even if they are all trying to backstab eachother cause they are pirates, but what the fuck is this shit? I don't even understand what happened during most of the movie, I was too busy gagging the shit out of myself and the horrible story line.

Also, what the hell is up with my group...I go all out at first and nobody joins, then all of a sudden Im gone and theres 50 fucking people here. What is this shit show? Am I fuckin tupac or something? Cause Ill tell you this. TUPAC IS DEAD FANBOYS HES DEAD. So don't give me this shit "AH HES REALLEASIN MORE ALBUMS BUDDEH" cause you know what? No nukkah can get shot 9 times. Not even eminem. Do you know why? Hes two midgets.

I hate people that idolize rappers and such. Rap is the worst genre of music and its basically a bunch of people going around acting black (whether they are black, or chinese, or wiggas, etc) And its really degrading. I know lots of established black gents, and the hood is nothing like they say it is. It is terrible to live in the ghetto.

Then theres the way that rappers talk. Its all like

"Here's what to do if you see him approach me,Pop that nigga, "I dont care if you know me. Half the niggas hatin on me used to be homies"

Like wow...If I said that to a brother in the hood I would def get a cap popped in my ass. Thats right. So WHY THE FUCK IS IT ALRIGHT FO THIS BROTHA OVA HERE TO SAY IT? I know about the years of slavery and such, but I never lived it. I would rather live where we are all equal, isn't that what everyone wants? How can we all be equal if we be hatin each other and usin hateful words? I wish that everyone would just shut the fuck up about rap, then there would be no hateful slander and the steriotyping that this shit brings would be gone from the wall to the window.

And thats the story of how I broke My ankle.

I hate Eggs

I am tired tonight, so I am ranting about the most useless food on the earth. Eggs.

Who eats these fucking things? I mean, they are good for you, but they are also bad for you? What the fuck! Its like a taco, sure the thing tastes good, but it will give you the fucking shits, not to mention gas that smells like fucking dog ass. The last time I ate an egg, I thought I was the shit, eating healthy and all, but you know what? I got a fucking half hour lecture about how these things were high in cholesterol. I mean who gives a fuck, you might as well just dump these things in your toilet, they are going to end up there like ten minutes after you eat them anyway.

There however is one useful thing for eggs. Throwing them at someone's house that has recently pissed you off. Not only do these things leave a fucking disgusting yellow residue all over, but they will never get it off. They will remember the day you got pissed off for months later.

Other than the odd prank, these things are useless and just plain shitty. Id like to kick the montherfucker who decided 'lets eat these things' in the fucking eggs themselves.

~ Adieu..

In The Beginning..

A long long time ago, In a computer desk not really so far away, there sat an angry nerd. This nerd was not just angry, but he was raged. Absolutely raged out of his skull. Here for your reading pleasure.....*drum roll*

I INDEED PRONOUNCE....

Myself.

Hello, My name is Lucas LeClair, and I am just some rando pissed off nerd here to let out my frustration of the world back into the world.

Something that really brings my piss to a boil would have to be Kentucky Fried Chicken. Its not even that I work at Mcdonalds or whatever, but its just the fact that out of two restaurants in my hick town, kfc is one of them.

First of all, their food is not even good. I mean the chicken tastes like it is a bucket of fried shit. I mean it even looks like it, it is brown and soggy. I wouldn't even feed my dog this stuff. You go there, they take your order, you wait like twenty minutes for your chicken...and I mean it is sitting there and just becomming even more soggier than when they first made it, which was like three hours ago. So they made your chicken hours ago, and you still wait 20 fucking minutes. I mean give me a break. So you get your chicken, you want it as a meal? Well I guess you can afford to get a fries and drink, but it is going to cost you what, ten, no wait, twenty bucks? Its ridiculous. I could go to my gas station and buy twenty dollars worth of junk food that is slightly better for me and get like four times as much.

Secondly, their drinks are pure water and piss. I dont mean they taste bad, but their is something seriously wrong with their drinking fountains. I get my nice diet pepsi and you know what? Its just a cup of ice and piss tasting liquid. Like seriously, is this place a joke or what? How about their fries. You go to open your fries and pull one out, but by the time you get to it they are all just one fucking cube of fries. They are cold, and somehow soggy and crunchy at the same time. Is this even possible? I mean you can barely eat them because they are a block. In fact last week, I was building a house for charity and we ran out of bricks. I decided to go to kfc and just grab some fries because you cant eat this shit, you might as well just use it for something..


Speaking of food, one thing that pisses me off is that I absolutely hate, and I mean waiting in line. Whether it is at a restaurant, a movie, or the carwash. FOR GODS SAKE, THE FUCKING CARWASH. I bought this shiny black car last month. I mean it is shiny and beautiful. I decided to take it through the dirt and have some fun, and it got a little muddy. I took it to the car wash, and you know what? I waited for fucking thirty minutes for one of the little stalls to open up and so I can wash my car. I mean, waiting in line for half of a whole hour TO WASHY MY FUCKING CAR....Who takes that long to wash their car anyway? I could wash, wax, and HAND DRY my car in that long. You look at some of the people out there these days and you are surprised that they dont die of pure stupidity on the spot. The worst part is when they open the door, drive half way out, then realize "OH SHIT, I FORGOTS ME HEADLIGHT!" then they drive in and have to wash their whole car because they missed one spot. I personally think to even drive a car you must have at least your grade eight education. That right there would not only stop over 90% of car accidents, but there would also be a 80% reduction in car drivers, and at least a 50% reduction in fuel right there.


That is just a little taste of my anger :)

I will be back very soon with even more rage and anger about all your favourite subjects. Even those damn americans! (Just kiddin, you guys are okay I guess)

Feel free to email me, You may even have your ideas published because it more than likely pisses me off...

~ Adieu..